Anyone who’s been thinking about moving to Southern California might seriously want to reconsider. Just take a look at these dreadful things we have to put up with here in SoCal. For those of us who already live here, we just want to make sure you know what you’re getting yourself into. You really don’t want to move here. Ever.
- The weather here is so unpredictable.
flickr/pip r lagenta Some days it’s 70 degrees and other days it’s 75. How can you plan for that kind of fluctuation in temperature?!
- It’s impossible to decide where to eat.
flickr/kent kanouse With so many award-winning restaurants, hidden local gems, and mouthwatering cuisine to choose from, you’ll actually have too many decisions to make. And who wants to be faced with so many delicious decisions when all you want to do is find a place to eat?
- The scenery is incredibly distracting.
flickr/sodanie chea Trying to focus while driving is nearly impossible. You might have to pull over to the side of the ride to take a picture because the landscape is so mesmerizing. What a hassle.
- The people here never smile. I mean NEVER.
flickr/gerald angeles Who can put up with that kind of attitude?!
- The beaches in Southern California have no personality.
flickr/Ed Suominen Just look at all that sand, blue sky, and crystal clear water. Who wants to spend a day surrounded by such predictable scenery.
- You’re forced to go hiking year-round in SoCal.
flickr/neon tommy Because it’s always so nice outside, everyone feels obligated to get out and seize the day and experience a new hiking trail. What a hassle to have the opportunity to be outside every day when all you want to do is stay home and watch TV.
- It’s impossible to find fresh fruits and vegetables.
flickr/CEBImagery You might go hungry as you search for a colorful ripe piece of fruit at a local farmer’s market. If only there was more variety here!
- You can’t go outside. EVER. SERIOUSLY.
flickr/nathan rupert If you go outside you might get too much of that sunshine vitamin. And that just sounds dangerous if you ask me.
- The year-round summer breeze makes it hard to know what to wear.
flickr/karol franks A light jacket? A sweater? No jacket at all? It seriously requires way too much wardrobe planning to live here.
- There’s never anything to do.
flickr/insaphowetrust It’s BORING in SoCal with a capital B. We just stay home all day and wish there was actually something fun to do.
- We can only eat outside 360 days of the year.
flickr/al_hikesaz It’s annoying to have 5 days out of the year when you can’t enjoy a beautiful dinner alfresco. The inconvenience is enough to make anyone decide that SoCal is simply a terrible place to leave.
- Living in Southern California will ruin you for life.
flickr/rennett stowe Living here is a hazard because there’s no other place that will ever stack up to SoCal. So it’s just better to never live here so you won’t know what you’re missing. Seriously, just stay away.
- If you’re afraid of heights this is a terrible place to live.
yelp/loren k. The mountains here are just way too high. Looking out over the towering mountains might make you feel dizzy as you take in all the beauty. It’s better just to avoid SoCal all together instead of risk this kind of danger.
- You’ll never want to travel anywhere else.
flickr/wendell Once you have a taste of what it’s like in SoCal, you may never want to travel to see other parts of the world. Why even bother living in a place that will put a damper on your desire to travel to other locations?
- Everyone will want to visit you.
flickr/russ alison loar Friends, family, and distant cousins will all want to visit you because you live in the most beautiful part of the country. How embarrassing to have so many people want to spend time with you.
Are you convinced yet? Do you see why you should stay away from Southern California now? It is such a hassle to live in this kind of place. Trust me. Trust all of us who live here, you really don’t want to be in SoCal. Seriously, please don’t move here.
flickr/pip r lagenta
Some days it’s 70 degrees and other days it’s 75. How can you plan for that kind of fluctuation in temperature?!
flickr/kent kanouse
With so many award-winning restaurants, hidden local gems, and mouthwatering cuisine to choose from, you’ll actually have too many decisions to make. And who wants to be faced with so many delicious decisions when all you want to do is find a place to eat?
flickr/sodanie chea
Trying to focus while driving is nearly impossible. You might have to pull over to the side of the ride to take a picture because the landscape is so mesmerizing. What a hassle.
flickr/gerald angeles
Who can put up with that kind of attitude?!
flickr/Ed Suominen
Just look at all that sand, blue sky, and crystal clear water. Who wants to spend a day surrounded by such predictable scenery.
flickr/neon tommy
Because it’s always so nice outside, everyone feels obligated to get out and seize the day and experience a new hiking trail. What a hassle to have the opportunity to be outside every day when all you want to do is stay home and watch TV.
flickr/CEBImagery
You might go hungry as you search for a colorful ripe piece of fruit at a local farmer’s market. If only there was more variety here!
flickr/nathan rupert
If you go outside you might get too much of that sunshine vitamin. And that just sounds dangerous if you ask me.
flickr/karol franks
A light jacket? A sweater? No jacket at all? It seriously requires way too much wardrobe planning to live here.
flickr/insaphowetrust
It’s BORING in SoCal with a capital B. We just stay home all day and wish there was actually something fun to do.
flickr/al_hikesaz
It’s annoying to have 5 days out of the year when you can’t enjoy a beautiful dinner alfresco. The inconvenience is enough to make anyone decide that SoCal is simply a terrible place to leave.
flickr/rennett stowe
Living here is a hazard because there’s no other place that will ever stack up to SoCal. So it’s just better to never live here so you won’t know what you’re missing. Seriously, just stay away.
yelp/loren k.
The mountains here are just way too high. Looking out over the towering mountains might make you feel dizzy as you take in all the beauty. It’s better just to avoid SoCal all together instead of risk this kind of danger.
flickr/wendell
Once you have a taste of what it’s like in SoCal, you may never want to travel to see other parts of the world. Why even bother living in a place that will put a damper on your desire to travel to other locations?
flickr/russ alison loar
Friends, family, and distant cousins will all want to visit you because you live in the most beautiful part of the country. How embarrassing to have so many people want to spend time with you.
If you need another reason to stay away from SoCal, here’s a list of awesome activities in Southern California that are absolutely free. I mean, who wants to save some money while having fun? What a silly concept.
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