New Jersey is a great state with lots to enjoy. If you want to enjoy it fully, there are some things you should probably avoid. If you’ve lived here long enough, you may already be familiar. If you’re new to the state, take note.
- Rush Hour(s).
Flickr/Bill Benzon Between 7-9 am and 5-7 pm, just stay off the road. If you don’t need to be driving, avoid highways like the plague. New Jersey traffic means a 15 minute trip could take 50, or more.
- The Garden State Parkway on summer weekends.
Flickr/Doug Kerr This photo was obviously not taken on a summer weekend. You can spend more time getting to the beach than actually ON the beach.
- MTV’s “Jersey Shore”.
Flickr/Chase Zalewski It’s a terrible depiction of the actual Jersey Shore. Most of the cast is from Staten Island anyway.
- Pumping gas out of state.
Flickr/Minale Tattersfield New Jersey gas is cheaper and you don’t need to pump it yourself. Why would you get gas anywhere else? If you need to, you need to, but if you don’t…don’t.
- Having a significant amount of property.
Flickr/Jazz Guy Property taxes. Some areas are more affordable than others, but it’s probably best to just have a patch of grass instead of a yard. We have plenty of great parks!
- Shopping on Black Friday.
Wikipedia/NightScream We have hundreds of places to shop, including many malls. Malls can get crazy any time of year, and the Black Friday deals really aren’t worth the hassle. Crowds? Long Lines? I’d rather wait for Cyber Monday or support small businesses.
- Hating on Bruce or Bon Jovi.
Wikipedia/RosanaPrada Not everyone here is a fan of Bruce Springsteen or Jon Bon Jovi, but enough of us are that it’s probably best to avoid bashing them in public. It’s not worth the argument.
- Mentioning Pork Roll or Taylor Ham in Central Jersey.
Flickr/istolethetv If you’re in North Jersey, you’re probably safe saying Taylor Ham. In South Jersey, say Pork Roll if you want to survive. Central Jersey is a mixed bag, look carefully at menus and proceed with caution.
- Eating pizza or bagels anywhere else.
Flickr/JoeHall You’ll only be disappointed. You may find a decent slice here and there, but it just isn’t the same.
- Toll roads, whenever possible.
Flickr/Doug Kerr They’ll cost you a fortune. Do you remember when a few coins would suffice?
- October 30th.
Flickr/GeorgeThomas Since it isn’t actually possible to skip an entire night, avoid leaving the house and be sure to park in the garage. Prepare for eggs, whipped cream, toilet paper, and silly string.
This list is all in good fun, but there’s some pretty solid advice in here! Is there anything else that everyone in New Jersey should avoid, if possible?
Flickr/Bill Benzon
Between 7-9 am and 5-7 pm, just stay off the road. If you don’t need to be driving, avoid highways like the plague. New Jersey traffic means a 15 minute trip could take 50, or more.
Flickr/Doug Kerr
This photo was obviously not taken on a summer weekend. You can spend more time getting to the beach than actually ON the beach.
Flickr/Chase Zalewski
It’s a terrible depiction of the actual Jersey Shore. Most of the cast is from Staten Island anyway.
Flickr/Minale Tattersfield
New Jersey gas is cheaper and you don’t need to pump it yourself. Why would you get gas anywhere else? If you need to, you need to, but if you don’t…don’t.
Flickr/Jazz Guy
Property taxes. Some areas are more affordable than others, but it’s probably best to just have a patch of grass instead of a yard. We have plenty of great parks!
Wikipedia/NightScream
We have hundreds of places to shop, including many malls. Malls can get crazy any time of year, and the Black Friday deals really aren’t worth the hassle. Crowds? Long Lines? I’d rather wait for Cyber Monday or support small businesses.
Wikipedia/RosanaPrada
Not everyone here is a fan of Bruce Springsteen or Jon Bon Jovi, but enough of us are that it’s probably best to avoid bashing them in public. It’s not worth the argument.
Flickr/istolethetv
If you’re in North Jersey, you’re probably safe saying Taylor Ham. In South Jersey, say Pork Roll if you want to survive. Central Jersey is a mixed bag, look carefully at menus and proceed with caution.
Flickr/JoeHall
You’ll only be disappointed. You may find a decent slice here and there, but it just isn’t the same.
They’ll cost you a fortune. Do you remember when a few coins would suffice?
Flickr/GeorgeThomas
Since it isn’t actually possible to skip an entire night, avoid leaving the house and be sure to park in the garage. Prepare for eggs, whipped cream, toilet paper, and silly string.
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